Andy Milonakis

"Andy"?

Andy Milonakis is a dangerous felon and should be avoided at all costs as he is currently being pursued by INTERPOL for Heroin trafficking. The DEA released a warrant for his arrest for violation of RICO laws. It is suspected he may be receiving plastic surgery since he apparently hasn't aged in over a decade, and is often disguised.

If you see Mr. Milonakis or a man with a pancake on his face call the following number: 1-800-USNITCH. DO NOT CALL the local police, as Mr. Milonakis is suspected of paying off officials and you may endanger yourself. I repeat, DO NOT CALL YOUR LOCAL POLICE. Call 1-800-USNITCH.

Update

• FBI WARNING - It has come to our attention Mr. Milonakis has set up the USNITCH hotline to trace the numbers of potential "Snitches". If you have called this number in the past 3 months it is likely you are under surveillance by the Aryan Nation and MS-13. We received a tip this morning (10-24-2014) that Mr. Milonakis has placed a $3,000,000 bounty on all parties suspected of bringing him to justice. Undercover informants have alerted us that he has hired hit squads in both Europe and the United States to, in the words of the associates of Mr. Milonakis, "Deal with" any and all potential threats.

The Washington D.C. Department of Witness Protection may be contacted at (202) 648-8620. Your life may be at jeopardy.